Lost Along the Way

Sometimes she couldn’t tell where she ended and the world began.

It was in those moments that she felt as if she was woven into the tapestry.

She could feel the very essence of everything.

It was both awesome and terrifying, like suddenly waking from a dream and wondering which experience was real.

She already knew the answer to that question:

Both.
And also, neither.

Real was in the eye and the mind of the beholder.

Which meant that what was real to her might not be real to anyone else, or actually real at all, for that matter.

It was these thoughts and many others that kept her searching.

On her best days, that search was inspiring.

On her worst, depressing.

It was by nature a means without an end.

It was a way to simply be, not to arrive.

She had hoped to eventually find a path or a purpose or at least an definitive answer or two.

It was not to be.

There was only here and now, and the peace that came with not trying to hold onto anything.

It took her a very long, dark night to accept that.

She was nothing if not persistent.

Eventually, she just got tired of the hunt and scared that she was going to run out of time.

So, she stopped.

And that’s when she saw the truth so clearly and vividly.

“It was never about finding anything”, she said. “It was about losing everything you thought you knew and needed and were, along the way.”